February is usually a month full of love and happiness thanks to Valentines Day. I am fortunate that I get to spend it with a woman that I love more than words on a screen can express. However, not everyone has someone to spend that time with. Some by choice, some not. This is for those whose choice it’s not. Enough I know sticks and stones may break my bones but fuck you because words hurt too. Words like “I love you” “I miss you” “I’m sorry but you made me do it” “If you didn’t [this], then I wouldn’t [that]”. Lies. Lies are what those are and it’s Lies that hurt. Lies tell me that you don’t respect me enough to tell… View Full Post

A Winter Nightmare

 ** This was written either my freshman or sophomore year of college. I believe the prompt was to write a brief scenario about waking up and being cold and finding out that there is no heat. Enjoy! ** Waking up was nearly impossible. My Eyelashes were dusted with individual icicles, my breath frozen in my lungs, and my blood chilled in my veins. I struggled to sit up. I attempted to open my car door and it wouldn’t move. Apparently the temperature had dropped so drastically after the storm last night that my car had frozen solid. Shivering did no good. A cold body trapped in a makeshift igloo, moving swiftly in the freezing air was a fail. I brought my knees to… View Full Post

Now: Sept. 2013 Poem Just Because

* written during my many mornings of insomnia rambling * I Promise I promise my love to you In more ways than one. I promise not to be dramatic Or exaggerate the small things. I promise to stand up when the time calls And not be any one’s doormat. I promise to always look my best As we are reflections of each other. I promise to always care Even when my demeanor doesn’t show it. I promise to tolerate your Redskins Even though I know the Cowboys are better. Lastly, I promise to give you all of me Uncensored, uncut, all of the time, me. So even when we argue Or when you may be frustrated, Remember these promises to you And remember… View Full Post

Then: Sept. 2005 creative writing assignment 10th grade

* assignment was to write 12 things I don’t understand* I Do Not Understand I Do Not Understand Why you caused me such pain Why you screwed me in the brain Why you caused me to go insane. I Do Not Understand Why you caused my soul to bleed Why you took advantage of me Why you left me in need. I Do Not Understand Why you abused me everyday Why I was used and raped Why you treated me like a dog that had to obey you. I Do Not Understand What caused you to lie, Why you “love me” yet wanted me to die. Why you got off on my tears as I cried. I Do Not Understand The lying and… View Full Post

Those Moments

In my most quiet of moments it is your voice that speaks your touch that engulfs me and your love that adorns me. It is in the heart of those moments that I feel…peace. All of my stressors and triggers evade my mind. No negativity can penetrate the power of those moments and return my thoughts to their original dark state. It is in the heart of those moments that I feel…safe. I can do anything become anything and know that if I ever falter or fall you will always be there to pick me up, nurse my wounds and encourage me to try again. It is in the heart of those moments if only for a moment when in the private comfort of… View Full Post